No I Don’t Want to be Your Mistress
The final paper for my class has turned out to be a little tougher than I originally thought it would be. So I took another break last night to check my Plenty of Fish messages. There were a few from a couple of guys I had already been exchanging messages with. Then there was a new one, from a 43-year-old guy with no picture on his profile. I didn’t think this was a red flag, so I read the message from him. He started by giving me a physical description of himself, where he lives, what he does for a living and then says, “Married but no sex life (:”. The rest of the message is telling me he likes curvey (that is how he spelled it) girls and thinks I look hot in one of my pictures.
I then was curious what his profile said. The longest relationship he has been in was over 5 years, well obviously he is married. He lists his marital status as single and he has children. He also says that he wants to make a million dollars a year, loves to spoil people and loves giving massages. His physical description on his profile says he is caucasian but in the email he sent me he said he is mediterranean looking. I am open to dating other races but don’t lie about what you are. Be proud of who you are.
His profile is filled with lies. So I confronted him about it. I sent him a message saying I was confused because in his email he told me he is married but his profile says he is single and looking for a relationship. I also told him it sounds like he is just looking for fling.
His response, “I want to get to know somebody sexy, I am married and looking for somebody exciting”.
I sent him a message saying I think he is on the wrong site if he is looking for someone on the side. I also told him I am not interested in being someone’s mistress. I wished him luck in his search.
This guy really needs to be on Ashley Madison if he is looking for an affair. Doesn’t he realize he probably won’t find what he is looking for on a dating site. Who knows maybe he will find someone on POF that will indulge him. I won’t be that person.
The other OMG moment on POF is when I saw my psycho ex as someone they recommend I chat with. I looked at his profile to see if he was still trying to lure women in by telling them he is a doctor. He doesn’t come right out and say it but as his profession he lists, Business/Medical. Oh I am sure he is still telling girls he was an OB/GYN.
Back to studying for my final tonight!
Your Attempt at Flattery Didn’t Work
I have been deep into doing my final paper and studying for my final. I decided to take a break and check out my Plenty of Fish action. I emailed a couple of good-looking guys and one of them, a 29-year-old sent me a chat request. Normally I don’t like younger guys but I am being more open to it. Well this guy just turned me off from any younger guy.
After saying hi he asked what I like. When I asked him to clarify he asked if I like to make out. SERIOUSLY?? He didn’t even try to have any small talk with me, it was right away to the make out. I told him it seems like he is looking for just a hookup. He said, “I am looking for a best friend with benefit”. Sorry buddy but yes you are looking for a fuck buddy. Then I told him I am over friends with benefits. Then he said and I quote, “You haven’t had one like me. And I like older friends with benefits”.
Two things wrong with what he said. How does he know I haven’t had one like him? And I do I know he would even be worth my time? I am guessing if he has to tell me that he is really good, he probably isn’t. My psycho ex told me the same thing. And he wasn’t that great. (Why did I stay with him so long?) His next mistake was saying he likes older friends with benefits. Yes he is younger by six years but him saying that just didn’t sit right with me. He didn’t just say it once, he said it three times. I get it you like older women but when I say I am over having just friends with benefits, you aren’t making things better by reminding me that I am older. His attempt to tell me he likes older women didn’t work as he had planned.
Then when I closed the chat window he requested to chat with me again. I denied his request. He obviously didn’t catch on that I wasn’t going to be his ‘best friend with benefits’.
And people wonder why I am over dating.
Don’t Cancel on Me…
…unless you have a very, very good reason. After JS and I had the talk in March and he told me he thought of us as friends with benefits, he tried to cancel on me twice. One time he told me he got a text about a birthday party he ought to go to and wanted to know if we could go out the day before we had planned. He told me this two days before we were to go out. I told him I had plans, which I did. He ended up keeping the plans with me and not going to the birthday party. The second time, he told me he had been sick all day and was going to go home and rest. He texted me this at the time he was to be leaving work and heading to my place to pick me up. The worst part was we had been texting three hours prior to that and he never said anything about being sick.
Then there is today. We had originally planned to go to an event on Saturday. It was all planned and then Friday 
afternoon I got an email from the event planners saying they had to postpone the event until sometime next year, due to weather and power outages. There was no getting around it. I let JS know and suggested we do something else during that time. I threw out some suggestions and he said he should go into work but suggested we do one of my suggestions, bowling, on Sunday afternoon. He said he would come pick me up. I was looking forward to Sunday afternoon because not only has it been a while since we have done something on a Sunday but also because we haven’t been bowling since the second week of knowing each other. I got everything I needed to get done and was relaxing while watching football until I had to get ready. Two hours before he was to pick me up he texted me saying he got a text reminding him he had made prior plans to visit friends, apologized for being flaky and suggested going on Wednesday night.
My response, “I don’t know, I was looking forward to today and didn’t make any other plans.” Then I told him I couldn’t go that night because I have a long day the following day. Then he suggested tomorrow night or Tuesday night. I told him I didn’t know and would let him know later. He said, “K”. Still pissed I told him I couldn’t on Monday night and not sure about Tuesday night. (And yes I really do have plans Monday night.) Then I told him, “Just sucks because you suggested Sunday”. No response.
I am not really shocked there is no response from him. He doesn’t like the confrontation or arguing. The major confrontation we had was back in March and that really wasn’t much. It just turned into having the conversation. I never really said anything about the last time he canceled last-minute mostly because he was sick. This time I felt I needed to. I needed to because I wanted him to know it wasn’t cool to cancel last-minute but also because he is the one that suggested the day and now he is telling me he forgot he had other plans. Why didn’t he look at his calendar to make sure before suggesting the day? When our Saturday plans got canceled, I suggested Friday night or Sunday. He is the one that said Sunday and even picked the time. It wasn’t me. And honestly as of right now I don’t even feel like telling him Tuesday will be okay.
Was I wrong to say something?
Plus Size Girl Dating 